Chatting with Long No Time Meet Friend- Made My Day

I have been busy these few weeks, with my job and some activities. In the midst of time, I could remember that I have been lazy and checking on unrelated working stuff, especially those social networking stuff which is not a good habit. Well, I still remember that morning, I got a new Facebook's message, it was from my friend, my friend at school. He is my junior and we haven't met for many years. I was surprised and happy to get his message. He was asking how I am doing here and all. That day, we chatted for almost a day. He updates me with how his life is so far and me too, updating him how my life is. 

I never expect we could talk quite deep into each life. He talked to me a lot of things, about his breaking up with his girlfriend. I did not ask much about that, but he said that for the first time he was drawn closer to his mum because of this. He said while he was losing one relationship, he was strengthening another relationship, which is good. I am happy to know that actually. It is another good quote I guess. It is what happen in life. you give and take, you may lose this but you win some other things at the same times. 

Then, we talked about his family issues, more to his brother, which has a wrong friends. I know his brothers and sister too, they have grown up a lot and I feel I am old. Time flies so fast. They were in Elementary School, but now they are in secondary school. Well, I know how he feels as the eldest in family. It is not easy to deal with family issues when you far apart from them. You can't really see them, talk to them. It is different to talk on phone and face to face. Luckily, my friend is so so understanding and mature. He knows what to do. I just told him to keep his communication on going with  his mom and family, his dad as well. I feel good and happy after talking to him, it refreshed me. I am pretty sure he must be feeling release. I know him pretty well. He is quite a cool guy, doesn't easily talk to people or talk to him. I hope he would doing okay. I found another hidden treasurer out there. Wishing you would do well with your family and believe that best is yet to come for you man!

Dream Wedding

There have been quite numbers of people around me are getting married; my sister, my friends and others people I saw in Facebook and all, hahaha...Everyone has different concept of wedding and yes, I will have one too not so soon in future! Too early for me to think about it, but even just to think about it, there are lots of hidden fun and not-fun things.

According to my boy friend, only lady will think and decide on their wedding because it is all their dreams and man will just follow. Really? If so, it won't be so much fun! Two parties have to involved in it! Well, it is still so far for me anyway, hahahaha..

Speaking friendly, dream wedding of every women is about quite a number money. You really need a good things and people to help you out, but if you are smart, wise and creative, it is not all about money, money, money...(Suddenly I remember the song titled, Price Tag by Jayaslee, nice song! :)

Through the social networking side or media internet searches, I could find a lot of things about wedding. It is awesome. You can get idea from those sources online and it's free. Then, it is up to you how you are going to make all there come true for you. With some modification and creativity, ideas form people, you will definitely have one great wedding concept. It is too much, I could say, both fun, tiring and not fun part on the budgeting side. You have to be wise, smart and creative.

I know a lot of good good wedding photographer. After some stalking done and few online searches, there are a lot and I bet everyone must be confuse how to choose. They have different price with different package. The gowns they offer until the concept of their photo taking, some are really really nice. You can choose what you want, but if you are not sure what you and you lover one, it is gonna be one tough decision; one that fulfills your dream pre-wedding photoes with comfort in pocket.

Start from the tea reception, dinner reception, family gathering, invitation cards, souvenirs, the programme run down, singers/ entertainers if you want to have (optional), Emcee,  the wedding theme/ concept you want, the food/ beverages and sisters brothers things, well...It is a lot of things to think about. Before the job now, I applied to work in bridal house, it seemed to be fun, working with those couple and making their dream come true, but of course, the sales part was not fun. I heard it's tiring, but due to some problem and consideration, I got another job now which pays me better now. 

All these seen things are not the point of course, but I bet everyone does have one idea in their mind about who their wedding is going to be look like, included me. I read one great article by Indonesian blogger, it was titled Marriage Over Wedding. Here are the best part written by him:

I often got reminded that no matter how beautiful your wedding is, how extravagant and how amazing the pictures turned out, all those pages of memories is nothing, zero, if you don’t have a great marriage afterwards. That is why, deep down in our hearts, we know there’s nothing more heart-warming like the sight of grandad and granny walking down the road, hand in hand.

 

Everybody who is doing weddings week in week out could easily got bored seeing the flowers, the dress, the pictures, the decorations, etc. But we are always inspired by stories of great marriages, where you know that ‘love’ is not just a phrase on wedding invitations, but often means tears, sweat and sacrifices.

I often said this to my couples just before I left them after the party, “Congratulations on your beautiful wedding. Let’s have a more beautiful marriage.” I say this by no means that I am an expert. Far from it. But only as a fellow married couple who reminded one another that the journey just had begun.

That is so true, things after marriage is the most important. It is the start for another journey. Are you ready then? Honestly, I am not ready yet. I know clearly that I am not ready yet. Thanks that my sweetheart know too. With all my emotional, selfishness and the way I behave and think, I still need time to be the real woman. for a man I believe there is no always so called good good times in marriage. I believe there would be problem at sometimes, down or any crisis time in life. There are so much think to talk, discuss and never ending topic to write/ to talk too. That is general and basic things that I think we must know. I need to listen from the expert. I listened some before and many more to come as time flies, hahaha.

Well, basically, I will always remember what was said by my sweetheart, money is not going to determine how good/ memorable/ beautiful wedding would be. It has its own way, with the ability, things, people and quantity, every wedding gonna be dream wedding for those lovers with people's loves and blessings around them. Things would be made perfect in its way. No matter how much money you have, with not much money too, you can have your beautiful dream wedding... :)

I am not trying to say too much or being an expert for this thing. It is far beyond what we think sometimes. It is just what I think/ dream, hahahaha...Wonder how mine is going to look like. Now, I am just looking around and try to save money as much as I can, hahahaha...

Holstee poster

Picks of the day!

"The best way, to serve God is to love many things" 

- Van Gogh

"A morning text does not only mean, "Good Morning" - It has a silent, loving message that says.. "I think of you when I wake up" 

- Joey Twentyfirst Night

"Being open minded is much better than being smart. By being open minded, you have limitless ideas and possibilities" 

- Alanda Kariza

Still, I want to be some one better! :)

Always in my mind and prayer, how much I want to change my self and to be changed to be some one better in life. To be some one that is thoughtful, generous, kind, caring enough and all, especially in socialization with people and things around me. I am not so sure what is so wrong on me; the way I talk, behave, act and present my self. Sometimes, I find nothing to talk with people who are quite close to me. There is no comfort sometimes.

I had lunch few days ago with some brothers and sisters from my church. I felt so weird and clumsy. I got nothing to talk actually. I can't really enjoy my self with them and it was a bit hard time, but it was okay...I think the problem is my level of being opened to people. Most of the time, it happens too, not only that time, but when it reaches the topic/ things that fits me, I guess I could get along well with you. Argh, I am not sure too. I wonder with my self, why am I who I am? I am bad, introvert and negative. I want a better me. Sometimes, I try hard and sometimes, I can't avoid my self to be so to. I just wish I could have some improvement on my self and hope people could see too, how hard I try at least.

September's Highlights

Hi to my blog and whoever might read my blog! =) It has been weeks that I did not write, I was so busy at work, hardly to have time for long lunch like I may usually do, hahaha. So, even when things/ ides pop up, I don't have time to write it down and well, I leave it or just forget that... XD

September is a good month. It a busy time with some holidays and fun in the midst. Ticks and tocks are following as well. Time flies and two next week is a pay time, fast huh? Honestly, I just in need in money and I expect it would last for this few months, hopefully, all expenses to come would be just enough for my needs, not my wants anymore, except for skin care, I am finishing them and now I wonder, which product to purchase, hehehe...

 The important highlights was not that. Here we go. I am not sure if it's called important or not, but it was one of my thought now. I was approached earlier this month by Pastor Hok Chiaw (I don't know how to spell it correctly) after Sunday morning church service. I was just saying hi to his wife and asking how she is now. Glad that she is getting better in her treatment and condition. Well, suddenly, he came to me and asking me whether I wanna change job or not. I was surprised and thought and said, "What job was that?". Then he replied me, a full time worker in FGA. I was like, me???!!!?? I felt happy, confuse, weird, worry too at the same time. He explained to me that the first three year would be internship; learning and working at the same time and others related things. I told him, I need to pray about that. I asked him too, why me? I am not good enough and too young in Him. He said we see your spirit and because you are young too, we need people like you. He told me I would be under him serving in youth ministry if it happen to be so with his daughter and all. He invited to join the youth camp in December and yes, I will go if I could squeeze in some days off. 

All first come to my mind was again, it was back to the time when I was looking for a job. I don't like the feeling. I think about it most of time now. Why me? Is it coincidence with my decision to leave youth team in the next year ministry at my church? Is it His calling or just a coincidence? I shared this with my sweetheart. He said I was not ready yet, but he advised me to pray for this. If it is, there will be a way. If not, there will be a way too. Oh God, this is another headache for me actually. I am praying for that, but not really pressing into Your presence for it. I was really worry. A lot of things make me worry, the pay (how it is going to pay off all my commitments, I heard the salary was low, much lower than mine now. However, money would never be enough. My boyfriend taught me a very important lesson that every amount of money we have, it has their own way in making life and God will always provide things that are more than enough for us). I could not avoid my mind to think about the pay, the leave, but honestly, I am excited for life to come if it is my way. :)

Sometimes, I think about things so easy. I am dreaming a  lot and being so childish in life. Well, I guess that's me. The approach made me think one most important things, am I ready if it happens to be so? Speak frankly, there are things make me worry, but if it is my calling, Lord show me Your way. I know I am too far from those ready and good person in You (too young, never been good enough for people, serving people), but I believe, You are with me and I could do all things in life through You who give me strength. Thank you Lord! xx

*This is my favorite verses now (I can do all things through You who give me strength) after I saw one Christian movie, Soul Surfer! The story was simple, but I was impressed by God's power and human's will.*

Holiday is over!

Holiday is over. So sad! I want longer holiday, hahahaha...Everyone wants! I just got back from Phuket with my dear man and his friends. Lots of fun, yet the food and the weather were not really good. The best I had was only the banana pancake and the steamboat, sob sob!...

I miss the massage and it will always be in our schedule whenever we visit Thailand. :) They are good (if you can find good one). Food as well, but Phuket was really bad on it., except those in shopping malls, we craved fro local foods anyways.  I will always miss their beauty shop too. Well, my next wanted shop to visit is Boots.

It is too late to meet her. Argh, I have so many things to buy. It was the only things I regret about and of course, food and sunshine. My next holiday is Taiwan. There is no Boots outlet there. It is only available in Thailand and Singapore. Well, Thailand, you will be in my next place again if there is cheap ticket. :) I love all stuffs at Boots; body lotion, hand cream, body wash, body scrub and all types of skin care and beauty products. I love you all and hope to see you again Thailand! :)

Sweet love of us; you and me!

This week has been raining and I don't like it. It was too cold in the office, making everyone of us not in the mood of working hard. I still prefer summer, even it is hot. Today is last day before long break and I am ready for my holiday! I can't wait to fly this Sunday to Phuket. Here, I would like to wishing my self and everyone a great, fun and memorable break time~

Well, today, I just feel to write something silly, simple and relaxing. Nothing much in life. I am just being happy to share things about my love; our love. We just had our second anniversary. It was not candle light dinner. No cakes, no wine, no music, no present and no roses, even pictures. It was nothing and far from dream anniversary for ladies and anniversary I have seen before, but I was happy with it.

We were having dinner together at my place! XD I cooked and the greatest gift of all was I could cook for him and he could come for it. We clashed in argument about it before, but finally, we had it. His coming was the greatest gift after all. I planned to have candle light dinner, but not much time for me to arrange a real look of candle light dinner. Cooking after working is quite a rush. I successfully tried the two recipes. Yay!!! More cooking and baking to come for you and me, others maybe if it turn out good, hahaha..

I cook one main dishes, one side dishes and soup. It was simple and he liked too. I cooked honey soy chicken kebabs (of course it was in honey and soy sauce), key west chicken (in garlic, lime and soy sauce) and mushroom soup. I prepare salad too. Both chicken should be grilled, but I was just having them fried in the frying pan. It was hard and tough to adjust, it almost got burn, luckily, I managed to deal with them. It tasted really good. :) Again, the most important things is he liked it, hahaha..Thanks for liking. I was really happy. Tiring but happy and satisfied. :)

I planned to bake a cupcakes too, but busy week drives me grazy. I have no time. :( I should try it out next time for you. Hm, we have no pictures taken. We prayed (not really praying, but wishes to each of us) may God be with us all these days to the end of the time. Guarding us and watching us in the loving journey and life. Hm, of course I wish a proper celebration, with gift, cakes and all, but after all, I learned that celebration is not the priority. The most important is we know how to love each of us and grow well in the love between us. Thanks my love to let me see clearly. If I was asked what I want, I just want to spend all my days with you by my side and that's it and yes, one more, please try to like pictures taking a little bit in the future.

Happy Anniversary!

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Happy Anniversary!

To

you

& 

me

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Thank you for your love and care all these time. 

Thank you for the great moments and times we have together.

Thanks to the teary moment too, it made us today! :)

Thank you for being one of the greatest gifts in my life!

Thank you for being there when I need you; being my friend, my love, my father, my brother and all. You are like coffee 3-in-1! XD

Thank you for being by my side; to support me and to love me for who I am.

Thank you for being patient every moment I made you mad and cried.

Thank you for making me happy justly at the right time in my life.

Thank you for everything that you have done to me in my life.

Thank you would never be enough.

Through you, I know even more about my self, to change, to love and to live.

Thank you love~

*

Father Lord,

 thank You for being with us all these days.

Thanks for planting the love seed in us and we have been growing in love of Yours.

Please let both of us to work that love into practical things so nothing can divide us.
We ask for words both kind and loving, and for hearts always ready to ask forgiveness as well as to forgive. 

Heart to love unconditionally.

Lord Father,

the strong love between us is greatest give from You.

Be with us and guide us that we could love each other more and more in Your way.

Jesus,

let both of us be blessings for each other's life and people around us.

Use us in Your way to glorify Your name, Your Kingdom and people.

From wellspring of my heart,

Thank you Jesus.

Amen.

*

Spiritual Work

Time flies and unrealizable , I have been serving in my church ministry for almost two years. I could see that everyone of us is getting up in serving him, hopefully everyone of us is having His servant heart. I hope me too learning to grow that seed in my heart and my life, because until this moment of time, I know I am not His real servant yet. :)

Being involved in worship team, youth team and Boys Brigade are fun things.I serve people and Him, I cry, I learn, I mad at people, I complain and I have fun and joy. It is a part of my daily and spiritual life. I contribute ideas of what I think, I could do what I wanna do sometimes, we know each other throughout the time and I realize that we are tied as a friends, families, brothers and sisters. Thanks to all of you! :)

Until last night youth's meeting, seniors were talking about developing personal relationship of everyone of us with God and focus in His ministry. It was like a reminder and alarm to me for next year ministry. Questions came to my mine, what if I have to let go one of those ministries which now I involved in? Could I let it go? What should I focus actually? 

Somehow, I made up my mind that I would let go Youth Team in the church (if I have to/ asked to choose) and get my self to focus in Boys' Brigade and cell group. I definitely would never let go my ministry in worship team because I love to sing. I enjoy 'our' time. 

Letting go would be never easy. Since I have that thought, I believe, I was directed by Him. He put in me spontaneously. I know there would be gap between me and few people if it happens because the time we spend may not be as much as before, especially now, everyone is working. It is only in meeting and certain times we are together, but one thing, I would be so happy if they involve me in helping them. I would help them happily with my best. I would lose some spaces for my ideas and doing things for people in church. I don't know why, I love to do things, this and that. Well, until now, I have bad intention, but I am happy that it is not much as before. It is about getting recognition. I know that is bad. Thanks to my man that always consult me in this and I would pray that He help me to be real servant through people and things around me. :)

Letting go one again means I would get a new space for learn again and my love to do things (this and that). It would be all out to BB and cell group. It is only the matter of different age group. I think it would be fun and honestly, I am excited as well. I may plan this and have that thoughts, but it is all back to Him. Four months to come, I am ready for next year. Relationship with Him and focus on Him would be one of the specific thing in the list of my prayer from now on. I haven't been serious and soak my self to His presence over those things. I learn that sometimes we need to let go things that we love to do to gain and do something even greater than now. I don't know what it is, but honestly, I wonder how and why God actually direct me to be involved in juniors/ children ministry such as cell group and BB. I was also planning to be involved in children Sunday school in English church. At the moment, I would hold it back and get into it once I am really committed. I just don't want to stop at half way. I am ready for next year, do you? :) Let's keep all these in our prayer and focus.

*

Father God, 

may You direct everyone of us to Your way,

to do things You want us to do and to be used.

Help us to be the real servant for You, of Your Kingdom and  for Your people.

I don't have many things that I could guarantee I would do well for You,

but You have my voice, my life and my heart.

Shape them all and get them ready for Your calling. 

Let us not to serve You and Your people blindly for acceptance and recognitions like I may have sometimes.

Give us the grace, commitment and sincerity to be Your servant.

I may not be the best with all evils seeds in my characters and personality,

but please keep me in Your eyes and guard me,

sweep away all those evils from me.

Strengthen me and change me inside out.

Give me Your mercy and grace to share.

Give me the wisdom of Your heaven so that I could do well in life accordingly to Your way.

I need you Lord every second,

in all aspect of my life. 

I am Yours.

Have Your way in me and forgive my sin.

Thank you Father.

In Jesus name I pray.

amen.

*

Last week of August

August comes to the an end soon. Eight months are gone now and I can't wait for events to come, like my holidays, my sister's wed (I worry as well) and of course Christmas! Still, it is a few months way to go. I hope I would have a break through for some things and people in my life by the end of 2011.

Back to August, this Monday is another start of a busy week before a long weekend to go! I am going to Phuket for this holiday. I am happy and ready to go! :) I just wish could have a great and memorable time with my loved one and his friends; my friends too. Wishing everyone to have a great great holidays next week! =)

Oh yeah, I felt happy yesterday during the time praising and worshiping Him at church! Nothing much or special, I was just being happy. I realize, I have nothing more to give Him except my voice, my heart and my life. That is all I could give Him; to be used by Him. Why these three? Well, I am not sociable enough in my own life, maybe it would be hard for me if I want to be used by Him in wider way; in more social way. Even my personality and characters, sorry...It is still long way for me to learn, to be prepared and to be changed by Him. I believe some day, I could be even a better person for Him and others. Hold me tight Father! :)

Just like months before, life is up and down. I have some conflict with my own self, my loved one, my sister, my family, my job, other people and things that I could not mentioned one by one. I know the only solution is to again, commit everything to Him! Really, I want to be changed by Him and be better person in this life! :) I am not trying to being pushy, but sometimes, when I have conflict with people and things around me, hmm..I feel sad, I was thing how great it would be if I could be just bit better person. :) I guess no one would know what I think. To someone and some people, I am not kind of talking without action. I mean, I could be out of track or my words sometimes, it is hard inside anyway. No one know and I have my reason sometimes why I act so. I know, this is what I should learn in life. While life is about experiencing, I hope with these lessons from life, I could be a better person in future. Put trust in me! I am not a member of NATO :) I am working hard too, argh...maybe not hard enough? Well, I will work harder then! :)

100 truths

It is just for fun!

1. Real Name: Leny Wiratan
2. Nickname(s): Leny, Len, Nini, Yin-Yin, Ayin
3. Favorite Color: have some colors; purple, green, brown, black, white, depends
4. Male or Female:Female
5. Elementary School: Methodist Banda Aceh, Indonesia
6. Middle School: Methodist Banda Aceh, Indonesia
7. High School: Chandra Kusuma School
8. College: Han Chiang College, Penang, Malaysia
9. Hair Color: Black
10. Tall or Short: 5.2ft
11. Sweats or Jeans: Jeans
12. Phone or Camera: Phone
13. Health Freak:hmm...Yes
14. Orange or Apple: Orange
15. Do you have a crush on someone:Yes
16. Eat or Drink: Drink (water)
17. Piercings: yes, ear
18. Pepsi or Coke: nope

HAVE YOU EVER:
19. Been in an airplane: Yes
20. Been in a relationship: Yes
21. Been in a car accident: nope, hopefully not too
22. Been in a fist fight: Yes
23. First piercing: ear, the only one
24. Best friend(s):Yes, max only up to 3
25. First Award: yes, but I can't remember
26. First crush: hm... I can't remember, quite a number and it was a long long time story
27. First word: Forget
29. Last person you talked to:my colleague
30. Last TV show you watched: Korean series
31. Last person you watched a movie with: my boy
32. Last food you ate: Char hor fun
33. Last movie you watched: not sure :(
34. Last song you listened to:arghh...not sure, but it's a Christian song
35. Last thing you bought: today lunch? :)
36. Last person you hugged: my boy...?


FAVORITE
37. Food: anything =D
38. Drink: water
39. Bottoms: Jeans???
40. Flower: anything nice
41. Animal: I don't really like pet
42. Color: hmmm..mentioned above! =D
43. Movie(s): Romantic moviesss and would like to watch some classical movies

(Put an X in the brackets if yes.)
45. [x]fallen in love with someone.
46. [] celebrated Halloween.
47. [x] had your heart broken.
48. [] went over the minutes/texts on your cell phone.
49. [x] had someone like you.
51. [] got pregnant.
52. [] had an abortion.
53. [x] did something I regret.
54. [x] broke a promise.
55. [x] hid a secret.
56. [x] pretended to be happy.
57. [x] met someone who changed your life.
58. [hope so, hahaha] pretended to be sick.
59. [x] left the country.
60. [x] tried something you normally wouldn't try and liked it.
61. [] cried over the silliest thing.
62. [not sure] ran a mile.
63. [x] went to the beach with your best friend.
64. [x] got into an argument with your friends.
65. [x] disliked someone.
66. [x] stayed single for two years since the first time you had a boyfriend/girlfriend.

CURRENTLY
67. Eating: nothing
68. Drinking: nothing
69. Listening: nothing
70. Sitting/Laying: Sitting
71. Plans for today:Movie and dinner with my friends
72. Waiting for: Few things from someone, always

YOUR FUTURE:
73. Want kids: Yes
74. Want to get married: Yes
75. Career: Good housewife after working some years with some small business maybe
76. Lips or eyes: Both
77. Shorter or Taller: ???
78. Romantic or spontaneous: Romantic
79: Love at first sight:YES!!! =D
81. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship
82. Looks or personality: Both

HAVE YOU EVER (Part 2):
83. Lost glasses/contacts: Nope
84. Snuck out of a house:Nope
85. Held a gun/knife for self defense:Nope
86. Killed somebody:Of course not!
87. Broken someone's heart: Yes, many times :(
88. Been in love: Yes
89. Cried when someone died: hmmm...

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
90. Yourself: Yes
91. Miracles:Yes
92. Love at first sight: Yes, why not? :)
93. Heaven:Yes
94. Santa Claus: Maybe
95. Aliens:Yes
96. Ghosts: Hhaha..No???

TRUTHFULLY:
97. Is there one person you really want to be with right now: Yes, always
98. Do you know who your real friends are: Yes, I know

It ends today, August 16, 2011 at 4.19 pm...

Sweet sweet poem

I found this poem when I was viewing the wedding pics of strangers, I knew them just as strangers too...They don't even know me, hahaha... Am I stalking them? Hm..nope, I was accidentally jumped into their profile account in Facebook and this is one of the sweetest poem I have ever read:

--------------------------​--------------------------​--------------------------​-----
Dear Joceline, There are so many things I love about you.
I love your childlike quality,
Your sense of wonder,
Your enthusiasm for life and love,
I love the way you understand me,
Better, than anyone I've even known.

The way you're always thinking of things to make me happy,
I love the fun we have together although sometimes I've got some of your nail marks on my arms.
The way you can always make me laugh with your millions of dramatic emotions and facial expressions.
Just when I need it most.

And I love the way I am when I'm with you,
I see things more clearly even though sometimes you make me lost in direction too ... haha
Through your eyes and your touch,
Makes me feel everything more deeply.
I love discovering the inner you,
That other people never see.
And the more I discover, the more I find to love.

I love you simply because you are you,
That's why I know for the rest of my life I will always be in love with only you.

--------------------------​--------------------------​--------------------------​-----

 

Wasn't it so sweet? It was her husband's part of speech on their wedding day...I could see how much they are in love through their photos and all...

Have a lovely evening everyone! :) May love will always fill each day of our life 'til the end of time! :)

Have a good weekend everyone! =)

"No relationship is perfect, ever. There are always some ways you have to bend, to compromise, to give something up in order to gain something greater…The love we have for each other is bigger than these small differences. And that’s the key. It’s like a big pie chart, and the love in a relationship has to be the biggest piece. Love can make up for a lot." 

— Sarah Dessen ♡

"You cannot live your life to please others.The choice must be yours." 

— Alice In Wonderland ♡

 

12.08.2011

If it comes in 1 2 3...

1. I want to experience a Christian concert for once at least in my life; Hillsong, Planetshakers maybe? :)

2. I know my self best. I still enjoy doing my things/ my activities alone compared to be with many friends whom I feel uncomfortable with.

3. I love to sing more lately, just more... :)

4. I have been quite lazy these few weeks. Argh... :(

5. I am preparing something big now.

6. I want to have my own mixer and baking oven. =D

7. I have struggling to have a hair cut or not.

8. I shopped at least once a month. I feel so bad and guilty. Price range was for below RM50.00 for each time. This month, I have had three times? :(

9. I could feel I am getting bit better, but still, I have my bad habits.

10. I am so lazy to work, if I could choose.

11. I pray for some people constantly... :) but, my Bible reading/ related reading habit was still so so bad. :(

Thing come and goes. People too,on and off. Life is finally about give and take. (I am not sure how this relate to my 11 things list, I am sleepy....Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Highlights of The Day

Before few highlights of my day, I just wanna say thank you...to my Lord Father, my man, my friends, my colleagues and my circumstances. Good or bad, You and others have made my day today! :)

What would be my highlight today?

First of all, last night, finally, I could spare some quiet time, not so long, but I had it...I was just reading and that's it! I was trying to get music played and sing, but I couldn't sing, the key was too high, hahahaha...Too bad! I feel like to sing lately, I would sing on my weekends maybe. =D

Last night too, me and my sister had been in small conflict. It was about putting our parents name in the invitation card. I would vote for yes and followed by our guardians, but it turned out to be yes after few debates. I wonder why there were so many taboos here and there, putting my dad and mum name were not a bad things. They should be the one who got the honor. It was just too bad them, they left us too early. I know and understand my sister was stuck in the middle yes or no with people around her. Some said no, it is taboo thing to do. Some changed from no to yes and that was the problem. As long as two parties doesn't mind, I guess it should be okay. I found no reason behind why not to put them in. How much I wish my sister could go back to Jesus's path. She knew Him long before and I have been and will always praying for her and her future family that some day, they would be with me, being a Christian. Amen.

I felt sad for my sis. There was no one helping her deep into the details of her marriage. I wish I could be there and how much I wish we don't live with many relatives. Me and my sister and some of us would be just perfect. It is more than enough maybe. Having a big families who are being non supportive in what we do is bad enough.

I was actually planning to gift my sister with a short video of me, my relatives and her friends. I have even sent an email out, requesting them to send their photos and some wishes for her and her future husband. It could be in video form too. Anything, as long as you feel to do that and no force at all. Only my mom's sister asked me about that, my good friends and my sister's friends, two of my relatives and not those whom I expected to be excited. I was quite upset and disappointed actually. At the other side, I try to think positively that they may miss the email/ letter, they maybe busy or forget. It was no right for me to ask everyone to be involved too. No matter how many and who are involved, I would still make that for me sister. It maybe be in simple, yet memorable way. Hopefully! :)

My sis also told me how my uncle and the family behaved toward her future husband. I get bit angry, upset and disappointed too. They are being non supportive from the start. They are good if they have good mood, if not, don't ask for more. I also keep my self to think positively, thinking a way to make things work and I encourage my sister, asking them to try harder and do what they suppose to do, and let God do the rest. They have to try harder and be patient. That's what I told my sister. She said yes, she will. I will always keep them in my prayer. It may not be everyone of them, but at least, my sister will always be in my prayer. I know deep inside, she must be so upset at the time, disappointed, struggling and fighting inside. I know she has been having more hard times compared to me. She is not tough as she may look. Sis, I wish it ended soon, be patient and hold on!

My mom's sister also told me to phone her. She wanna talk about my sister. I am scared actually. What else she wanna told me. Is it a good things/ bad? Is it a complaint? No idea. I just know I am scared. I will be calling her this weekend as well. Let's see what the story is about. :)

Last thing about last night, I asked my auntie about wearing same color dress during my sister wed. I have been asking her few months ago and she said she is busy. Well, okay! Yesterday, I texted her and again, she was not suggesting anything. We talk about other things and it ended there. I just want to try to get her involved, make them feel they are important and we need them, but nope, the gate was closed and that was it. We didn't come to the end of the discussion and she didn't reply me too. Clearly, I could see that. Did you too?

I told my sister many times that be patient, get them involved and make them feel they are important. It didn't work well like I think. Maybe it was from the start that things between them and the families were not discussed, that's why. I just wish this marriage won't bring anyone of us and my relatives to an end in term that oh..finally...she is married or finally, she is there or anything. May the day be a happy day for my sister and a new life for them, a fresh beginning of their love and life. As well for my family, let it not be the end.

Honestly, these things have been in my mind, quite sometimes, on and off. It comes and goes. I am tired, even me, I am tired. How about my sister alone there? I know her well, she is the most under pressure at the time. Herself and her future husband are. Be patient my sister. Hold on. End of this chapter is coming soon. Few months to go...

Song of The Day

Hold Me - Jamie Grace

I’ve had a long day I just wanna relax
Don’t have time for my friends, no time to chit-chat
Problems at my job, wonderin’ what to do
I know I should be working but I’m thinking of You and
Just when I feel this crazy world is gonna bring me down
That’s when Your smile comes around

CHORUS:

Oh, I love the way You hold me, by my side You’ll always be
You take each and every day, make it special in some way
I love the way you hold me, in Your arms I’ll always be
You take each and every day, make it special in some way
I love You more than the words in my brain can express
I can’t imagine even loving You less
Lord, I love the way You hold me

♥ ♫☼ ♫ ☼♪♬♫♩ ♫♪♥ ♬ ♫ ☼♩♬♫♬☼ ♫♥ ♪ ♫♪♬ ♩♩☼♫♪☼ ♫ ♫ ♩♪♬☼♥ ☼♩♬

 I love this song! Yes, Lord, keep holding me please! 

I love the way how You hold me...No one would hold me like You do! :) I need You Lord!