Turn Around

Matt Maher

from the album The Love In Between
  Young man on the side of the road
Lost and beat up with no where to go
Smells like a hangover from days ago
He does what he can to survive

Single mom with a dead end job
Ninety hour week just to keep what she's got
With the bills that add up and down she's caught
She does what she can to survive

Well, let me say
That love won't take away the pain
But don't be afraid
'Cause it will never walk away

(Chorus)
If you're scared that you don't matter
If you're lost and need to be found
If you're looking for a Savior
All you gotta do is turn around

Some turn to a bottle
Some turn to a drug
Some turn to another's arms
But it seems like it's never enough

Well I won't say, that you will ever fail again
But there is grace
To wash away your every sin

Chorus

No one listens to you anymore
And your heart has broken down
You don't need to move
Love has come to you
All you gotta do is turn around
All you gotta do is turn around
Turn around

You don't have to take the broken road
You can turn around and come back home
(X3)

Chorus

No one listens to you anymore
And your heart has broken down
You don't need to move
Love has come to you
All you gotta do is turn around
All you gotta do is turn around





"That is right. Sometimes, what we got to do in life is just to turn ourselves around to Him and lay all of ourselves again to Him. His graces and love would come for us then."

Days of Last Week of June

Days of last week of June have been good days for me and bad in some way. This week, I have ha slots of workout, included gym, swimming, jogging and even walking and today too. I am going to have another workout today. I am going to make it a habit now to tone and firm up my body and for sure, to have a healthier life style. I enjoy gym and walking amongst all anyway. I have stopped my yoga due to my time and financial. Free is much more better, hahahahaha...

Basically June has been a shopping month for me. I spent a lot this month and kinda sad when I think and count my bill. Anyway, I keep comforting my mind that I am using my money in correct way, such as food, it is daily needs, my sister's wedding shopping, she is my sister and wanna do my best what I could do for her for her only big big day in life, my own shopping, I need some rewards in life too...Too many excuses actually, but that is it. I need to learn to control my expenses in the future. I am not a shopaholic like most people think, I know some people think me so just because I take on my old new dresses/ clothes and they never see it. I buy things I need and when I am really think that I need it in/ for the future. I like to buy gifts for people too, hahaha...Some people I meant. Thanks June, I got few favorite free gifts too; book and lotion.

Yesterday, I also had a great lunch of the weekdays. I shopped too. Argh, I bought a lacy tube dinner dress in black and a retro classic dress in maroon brownies with roses. They cost me RM142.50. Quite expensive in a way but still good deal for two dresses.  These dresses and my others dresses inspire me to keep working out. I have been in love lacy and  flowers recently. I love little dresses anyway. It nice, sweet, easy to wear and almost fit all occasions.

Anyway, I am reading some books now; Bible, The Pilgrim's Progress, Experiencing God and How to Comfort the Grief. Thanks God that I have the will to read them and try to make them to be apart of my life, a habit. May God be with me during the reading. Open my eyes to see and understanding more and more of you. Thanks God!

An update for my life, I feel bit far apart from some people in church and my colleagues, but good thing, I am doing okay with them actually, just my troubled and narrow mind always think there is something wrong with how I am doing with people. I just follow my heart. I always have my self trapped between my feelings and what people think is right. I want to learn to follow and go for what make me happy and comfortable. Unless, I want everybody to be happy except my self. It maybe hard sometimes for me and even others. I still get to compromise sometimes.  I am learning to deal with this anyway, wish me luck people. God, guide me!!!~

Quite Worship Sunday

I never experience this before. I was usually excited for Sunday worship because I like to sing and I could say, it was another quite time between me and Him, but yesterday was different. After the first worship song, I feel so tired and was not in spirit to sing to praise and worship. I felt so exhausted. I didn't pray and ask much from Him as what I usually do. I was not so sure what happened to me, but for real, I never felt this before. No matter how tired and how sleepy I was and I am, I am sure, I was never like this during praise and worship session. Is it called spiritually tired? All I did was cried out to Him, but I was unable to talk and pray much. I recalled my life; the good times and bad times, how much I miss my family and how much I wish my sister would be happy. I was so thankful that God is good to me in my life; giving a great mean and putting me amongst His family. He blessed me with all His great things.

I kept repeating prayer of being humble in Him and waiting upon Him for all things I have ever asked from Him; what ever is that. I kept repeating that word and asked Him to help me in my life; to be stronger and better. Then, I felt like to kneel down, I was really really and extremely tired, I could not say more word and finally I left my place, walked to the back and kneel down. I said nothing, except, "Father, thank you! Please, help myself to be humble in You and wait for You in this life. Strengthen me and change me inside out!". That was all I did during yesterday session. I never feel so exhausted and tired to pray and ask tons of things from Him, but yesterday was totally different. It was once peak and climax moment in my life time that I realize, sometimes, I just need to be quiet, humble and wait for Him...I knelt down, thanked Him  and once again, I lay all aspect of my life at His feet.

Good days

24.6.2011

The past week has been great to me, Friday lunch at Delicious at Strait Quay with my lovely lady from my church. She had a hot lemongrass tea and Gado Gado (It is an Indonesian food; vegetables with peanut sauce). I had my spicy Crabmeat spaghetti (It was no called spaghetti, I forgot the name, hehehe)...and we had a Red Velvet Cupcakes with Frozen Cream Lemony Cheese, slurrppppppp....Nice!!! I would definitely bring my man to this place some day to have cakes!!! For this lovely Fly day, of course I wanna thank Mr. and Mrs. Loo for their time and great treat on me, but the most special thanks goes to Mrs. Loo for her time to listen my stories, complaints and so on and for her stories sharing! Tons of thanks always to you.... :)

At Friday night,  I had my cell group with teens and youths in my church. So happy that we were all together  seven persons, what a great number! :) I was not really keen in cell group recently as the number kept dropping, but that night changed me...I promised to myself that I would attend cell group for those children whenever I could make it, just for them...However, I may be off on every once a month for my personal course. They made me see who much love, cares and support they need, families, schools and friends may not be the main source of strength for them to cope with life and things in their journey. Again, it made and reminded me to always be thankful and grateful and realize how good my God is to me and my life. They need us; people and children of God. I hope through this cell group, I could to attend to their spiritually and mentally needs, just let Your will be done through us and the time we gather, please let your Holy Spirit work through and in us Father...Blessed us again to be blessings for these children...! Amen...

25.06.2011

Another brand new Saturday for everyone of us who serves in the 21st Penang Boys' Brigade. My intensive class for white badge had a test that day. I got to know, they really studied and could do well in their exam even some were not, but at least, they put their effort to study. For the next classes, I would try to apply more and more practical lessons and activities to them I am going to reward them this Saturday then.

As usually, Saturday is a very tight day. My half day goes to Boys' Brigade and few hours before we have bible class with Mr. Loo at church. Luckily, we didn't have class last week, I could have my nap before the durian party at Eric's house. I didn't eat any that night, I had had my dinner on Thai foods before we went up. For me, it was expensive to pay RM20.00 since I may not eat amount of durian worth RM10.00. I was being bit calculative according to my man, so what??? Hehehe...I had my cycling session that afternoon and I enjoyed the night with cycling and fellowship. :) I had herbal jelly with Jeeson and Tai Wei before I went back. We planned to leave Eric's house earlier but ended up, we arrived at home quite late as well, hahaha...I had a good night sleep that night and can't wait for Sunday. I have date!!!

26.06.2011

Another great Sunday was for me. I had ladies date that morning. I started my day with croissant and hot chocolate in Starbucks with my lovely elders again! :) What a good Sunday morning! I didn't talk much about my personal life that morning. We really had a relaxing morning with light talk on various topics. We also did shopping too to Crabtree & Evelyn, I got free gift from Mr. & Mrs. Loo, tons and tons of thanks again to both of you. I enjoyed my day and felt so happy. We went to the Face Shop and did little shopping for my sister. Mrs. Loo also bought some wet tissue for removing make up and eyes masks and ended up, I got the member card for the Face Shop. Last shopping for sister's is coming soon~

We were not ended up there. After dropped by to skin care and cosmetics outlets, we visited some fashion outlets, I met so may nice and sweet little dress, but they were too spicy in price, hahaha...I enjoyed with the window shopping. It was a real shopping time for me after sometimes with Mrs. Loo. Even, I drop by to Gurney, I will go in rush just to check things out, but that Sunday was different before we had a great lunch at Dragon Eye. We were treated by Mr. Loo. Thank you Mr. Loo! :)

Real and true, I enjoyed mu Sunday! :)

Finally！

我终于明白那种感觉，那种无发帮到我们最爱的人的感觉。。。我只能默默的的支持她一定要加油到底， 不管怎样。。。希望有一天她会找到她真正的幸福。。。姐，你一定要加油，也一定要幸福！我爱你！不管我在那里，你和他们是我的最爱！！！ ❤

My Dad's days

Yesterday was Father's Day. Too bad, both my mum and dad were not on this world anymore. I miss them in those special occasions. They had been gone for seven years, but still, I still miss them. I don't hope that my love for them will become less. Of course, I don't even hope I would forget them one day. I just wish me and my sister could keep them in our heart forever and let it be story and history of our lives, let them be our hero forever and never let the story become tragedy for our lives in the future.

Compared to my mum, I remembered lesser things about my dad. It might be because I was too small. I was about 13 years old when I was last stayed with them together. I didn't know if the age of 13 years old was considered too small or my memory was low. Th fact is that I didn't really remember every little things about my dad.

My dad was an optician. I was not sure how he started that, but I guessed he followed his older brother footstep. My dad was an optician in other state for few years before he came back to our hometown and started the business there. Talking about business, my dad's business in our hometown was not really good due to the high competitions amongst opticians during that time, but at least, he stayed with us. If not, he usually would only be homed about once a month, I hardly remembered about that. Anyway, he drove back from the other state to our hometown. Me and family usually visited him during our school holiday. I still remembered he drove us for good food and beach. I still remember that we knew his two good friends there and we were friend to his friends' children. I lose contact with them since my dad was back to our hometown and since after the Tsunami in 2004. I was last contacted one of them years ago and now, we lose contact with them.

My family was not a rich family, but we stayed in quite big and old wooded house with a big big field. It was not in city center. We had different people as our neighbors, but wonderfully, my mum and dad dealt with them well, but still, our house was robbed once. Go back to my dad, he was not an educated man and rich compared to his siblings, but he was greatest amongst all, I guess and other people said the same. He was a simple man with simple life. We had car once, but I was not sure if it was fully my dad or his siblings helped him in getting the car. My dad ate everything, he was not picky in foods and clothes. We lived good life everyday, at least we were never in hunger. 

My dad usually would drive me and family every weekend to beach or just to have a ride around my hometown. Beach was our favorite destination because we could swim and play with friends, and for sure, we usually would have grilled fish and coconut along the sea side. I am personally now, hardly to have this kind of time, maybe people that I mix are modern enough and don't really bother to do this kind of things. Too bad, dad had to sell his car because of financial and internal problem (with his siblings). I was not so sure. Soon, he got his motorbike, he still rode us sometimes and hardly to have a family time that days. Hm, my dad was a tall and good looking guy. He was thin but his stomach was big enough (old man maybe).

I still remembered a day in my life time that he was really angry and mad at me. I was forcing him to bring me to my friend place which was so far away from my place just because Tisah, my friend told me she had lots of pets and animals at her house. She was staying nearby jungle in rural area. My father beat me for that because I was forcing him. I guess I won't forget that day. I didn't hate him anyway, I hardly remember if I hated him few days after that, I guessed so.

I miss them, my mum, my dad and my brother. Every moment that I spent with them was treasurers in my life. Dad always gave compliments about my self. I was so happy about that. He must be proud of me. Every one in my family know how bad my attitude is (especially for selfish and stubborn), but he loved me more compared to my sister and my brother (my mom loved him more, but they both still loved my sister too, the level was just slightly different by one or two points maybe) . It might be because I talked to him more and I didn't scared of him. He likes to hit my but just to play with me. He liked to listen to me when I was karaoke-ing. I liked to get my self pampered to him too and yes, I usually helped in massage by walking up on his back. He liked it, hahaha. 

I miss to spend more time with them actually, especially in the time that I would work and have my own money and life. It would be great if I could share with them; buying them things they want, treating them for foods and drinks that they want, having holiday with them and my sister. Honestly, my family seldom had a holiday family. It was very rare to have everyone of us gather together due to financial, times and places. At the other side, I am happy that both mum and dad were gone for good sake that they didn't have to worry about paying insurance, paying bills for us, worrying me and my sister, having difficulties to deal with earthly problems nowadays. They were in peace now. However, for my brother, it was too fast for him to be gone forever. Everyone of us and my family know that my brother was not loved by everyone. It was because he was naughty, he didn't speak Hakka well (because of circumstances and people he dealt with), because he was not smart and so on, but he was my dearly loved son. Me and my sister didn't deal well with him too, again, we were not old enough to understand him. When he was gone, I realized we didn't do much and love him much. I was regret about that and further, last, my mum said he was getting better; he studied well, he became more and more mature as me and my sister were leaving mum and dad for education. I never met him for six months since me and sister were in Medan. I hated the fact that he was too young to go forever. 

If there was a chance for me to say the last things with them, everyone of them, my mum, my dad and my brother, I would say:

"Mom and Dad, thanks for everything that you both had done for me and sister. We are doing great in life. We have good life with lots of up and down sometimes. Sister is getting married this November with someone who loves her. She is going to have her own family. You both have to watch her out from the above, especially her marriage and her happiness in the future. Me too, I have a great life. I have good job, I bought car, insurance and have saving on my own. I have great lover who loves me so much and loves me for who I am. His family too, love me. I have bunch of brothers and sisters in Christ. I always have someone to talk to about your both. We both have good and great life. You too must be happy and proud of both us.

For your brother, I love you and hope I could do more just for you. The time we spent was too short. I love you so much. Me and sister wanna be a part of you three again in future life"

Mom, Dad, you both may know and see how well we could deal with siblings from your both sides. We are not doing great with everyone of them, but believe me and sister that both of us have tried our best. We could not please anyone and get everyone trust on us. You must be know how hard we try. It is true that we couldn't get along with everyone of them, but one thing for sure is we will always remind our selves to be thankful and grateful to have everyone of them when you both are gone. They love us and help us a lot. May God give me and sister more wisdom and strength to deal with them. May God bless them just like how I was ever blessed to have both of you three in life. 

Forget about them and let's go back to my dad's days! :) No matter how many and how much things I remembered about him, I am happy to be a part of them, I am proud to have this man as my dad (ordinary man who left some extraordinary things in my life and some people life-they said my dad was a very kind and good man, the best amongst his siblings)...Thanks dad for everything you have done for us. We may not or ever shower you with praises or mention your name in songs we sings or our daily life, but you have a special place in our hearts. No one would know how valuable the moments and time we had; even good or bad, but I will always be proud to say that you are my dad, my hero. Thanks Dad!!! I love you and will always miss you-miss you to be beside me to walk down from aisle one day!

Tons of hugs and kisses from me and sister!

Him: Don't ever worry about how much you want to have your family. Don't be sad when you think that you lose them and you are alone know! Everyone of us love you, mum, dad and my sisters. We love you so much.

Her: Don't let the pass haunt you for the rest of your life. You can make a choice on how you want your life would be now and in the future. You may miss a lot of family's loves and times, but make sure that you won't let your future family miss that treasurers as well!

Honestly, my Heavenly Father, another Father of mine has blessed my life. He is really showing me how much He loves me and works through times and spaces that I was in and I am in now so that I could have a fruitful life in Him now and future. Thank you Lord, may Your love always give me strength to live my life accordingly to Your will and plan. Blessed my sister and people that have been blessings in my life. Nothing much I can do for them to thank them besides being thankful and grateful and submitting their life to Your hands. Amen!!

Daddy's Day!

Daddy's Day is coming!!! It is on Sunday, June 18, 2011.

Dad,

Happy Father's Day!

We love you and miss you so much-always!

❤

Lots of hugs and loves,

me and Sister

He Never Sleeps by Don Moen

I have listened to the song all day long, started after lunch time. Thanks to Everlyn for sharing the song with me! :)

When you've prayed every prayer that you know how to pray --- When it comes to prayer, you and me know well how to pray, what to pray, we talk and ask too much in our prayer sometimes. Rarely of us, keep quiet and be humble in Him to wait and know what He wants.
Just remember the Lord will hear and the answer in on it's way --- It is true that Father will always hear our prayer; no matter how long and how much you and me ask from Him. No matter how good or bad the word you use, no matter how many things we ask from Him, He knows very well even before words are spoken out from our mouths. 
Our God is able --- He is our Father who knows us very well and to this very day, every second and little single things in our life matters lot for Him, but sometimes we tend to forget how great and able is our God.
He is mighty --- He is our powerful and great God. Nothing is impossible in Him, as long as we put faith, trust and belief in Him.
He is faithful --- No one could be as faithful as Him. He keeps His word and promises, but we are redeemed sinner who usually will forget about it. We rush Him most of the times. We are scared and think that our times should be His times. Bible said that flowers and earthly things may fade away, things may change, but our Father is the most faithful amongst all. You and me, as well as circumstances will change, but not Him. He is the Lord who will never change.
And He never sleeps He never slumbers --- He is always at work around us, through people around us, the scriptures, Bible and circumstances. Sometimes, you and me need to be quite in Him and wait to see that He never sleeps and slumbers.
He never tires of hearing our prayer --- No matter what and how we pray or talk to Him, He will never feel tired. It is because He is our faithful and mighty God. Our Father who cares everyone of us so much. It is us who tired, sleep and hibernate in Him when He asks us to wait for Him. 
When we are weak He becomes stronger --- When you realize or not, when you know it or not, when you believe in Him or not, His way and direction are there for us when we are weak. When we are weak, it is His time to keep His words. He lift us up high when we fall and about to give up. We just need to turn around, keep moving and waiting in and for Him.
So rest in His love and cast all of your cares on Him --- Never worry about your life anymore. Cast all your weary and burden to Him, only Him. He will take care of You. You and me just need to put faith in Him that in Him, with Him, everything will be fine and you and me will bear much fruit in life.
Do you feel that the Lord has forgotten our need --- It is common for you and me to have the time when we feel He is so far away. It is undeniable that there is always a crisis moment in our relationship with Him. There are things in life that lead us to the crisis. It is time for us in learning how to keep our faith in Him, how to turn around and keep waiting for Him. It is our choice to walk away and stop or to turn around and wait for Him again.
Just remember that God is always working in ways you cannot see --- Bare in mind that God is always working around us. We just need to stop for awhile to observe things, people and circumstances around us. There was a song of Blessings by Laura Story. For me, that songs is the best song ever to see how God works around us.

Our God is able --- Again, nothing is impossible in Him as long as you believe in Him. His graces and blessings for you and me would be just great and more than enough.
He is mighty He is faithful --- It because He loves us so much.

2.53 pm

I just read my previous blog, I realize there are differences, but I am not sure what those things were...Journalism, blogging and writing is great way to keep our memory over things and people, times and any moments in life...When I laughed at some points, tried hard too to think what I felt or what happened at the time I am writing..I forgot some, luckily, I still have some writings left :) I will keep writing as long as I can write and I have time to write, write and write, simply just to write what I wanna write :) Thank you God, I still have this way to express my thought and my hardly spoken words...

#2 song

From The Inside Out

Phillips Craig & Dean

from the album Fearless

A thousand times I've failed
Still your mercy remains
And should I stumble again
Still I'm caught in your grace

Everlasting,
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending,
Your glory goes beyond all fame

(Chorus)
My heart and my soul,
I give you control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise become my embrace
To love You from the inside out

Your will above all else, my purpose remains
The art of losing myself in bringing you praise

Everlasting,
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending,
Your glory goes beyond all fame

Chorus

Everlasting,
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending,
Your glory goes beyond all fame

And the cry of my heart is to bring You praise
From the inside out Lord, my soul cries out

My soul cries out, my soul cries out to You
My soul cries out, my soul cries out

#1 song

Your Great Name

Natalie Grant

from the album Love Revolution

Lost are saved
Find their way
At the sound of Your great name
All condemned; feel no shame,
At the sound of Your great name
Every fear; has no place
At the sound of Your great name
The enemy; he has to leave;
At the sound of Your great name

(Chorus)
Jesus, Worthy is the Lamb that was slain for us
Son of God and Man
You are high and lifted up;
That all the world will praise Your great name

All the weak, find their strength
At the sound of Your great name
Hungry souls receive grace
At the sound of Your great name
The fatherless, they find their rest
At the sound of Your great name
Sick are healed, and the dead are raised
At the sound of Your great name

(Chorus)

Redeemer, My Healer, Lord Almighty
My Savior, Defender,
You are my King

Redeemer, My Healer, Lord Almighty
My Savior, Defender,
You are my King

Jesus, the name of Jesus
You are high and lifted up
And all the world will praise Your great name

Chorus

My enemy is myself

The saying about "your biggest enemy is yourself" is just so true. I realize about this not only this time or this moment, but I just feel I need God's help to destroy the enemy in my self. In my life, I have taken almost everyone and everything to be my enemy. It is so true that my elders said everything in my life all matters lots to me. I wonder why sometimes I am being too detail ;)

The truth is that I think and ponder too much and sometimes beyond the fact. I am not sure and know if it is all are just my thoughts beyond or the truths. I don't care if it is true, I just wish I could have a better and perspective toward my life, really...a positive attitude so that I could live happier, I am not saying I am not happy or always under tension or stress, just a happier life in which reflected that I don't feel sad, annoyed or upset/ jealous or angry easily when someone is better than me, when I did not get something that I want. Simply being positive!:)

I want to learn to accept others for who they are, I want to learn to love them just like how I love my self and others things (or at least, I do not hate them), I want to learn to be happy in person's happiness, I want to have joy when people rejoice in their life. Could I? If yes, how long then I would be someone like that?

I guess almost everyone knows that I get upset or annoyed so easily when something/ someone, hmm..no, especially someone was being recognized more by others while I am doing or putting more effort in something that I do or anything, even the simplest things in my life, I take them too serious. I am bad too in hiding those emotional. People who are around me, whether they know me well or not, I can not lie them about my emotional.

Honestly, I complaint a lot about people; I do not like this and that, I want them to be like this and that, my boyfriend said I have to learn to not complaint for a day and he will be happy. I know that but sometimes I told him things I dislike just because I need to tell some one, is it a complaint as well? I don't know, hahaha...Recently, I just really realize about putting trust in God that He will change me and make me a better person. This morning, I was listening to K-Love and there was song Trust in Jesus by Third Day. I was having teary eyes. I have pictures of my problems, obstacles, wishes and hopes in my mind, a lot, tons of them maybe. It is about being someone better for people that I love, for people that love me, to be a positive person towards life, to be able to help my sister, to be someones who is sincere in doing things and living this life, to be someone better for my friends, family and relatives and all. It is so much more than this that I could describe one by one. That is much more than this that sometimes I do not know what I want exactly.

Back to the song, the song just hits me that have I trusted my God fully as my Savior, Redeemer and my Deliverer? No, not fully 100%. I still do things with my own understanding sometimes. The song reminded me that I have to put my 100% trust in Him and focus my life on Him, so that all the problems and obstacles that I have would be something I am thankful and grateful for, so that all those negativism and worry would turn to be a blessing in my life and for others. The truth is that I am not able to focus my life yet to Him. I keep reminding my self daily that I need to invite Him to come to my life everyday and every moment in my life, to have a full control of my life.

Father, I am so thankful and grateful that You put me here

You blesses me with a lots of things and people

Yet, sometimes, I ask for more from you

After the youth camp, something is really touching me,

no word can describe actually how much I am being thankful to You

No one would understand why, because my self don't even understand

I don't know why

What have You been doing?

Which part of my life that You touched that days?

Father, You know I am not religious and not being enough spiritual compare to many other Christian

but I believe You make Your way for me

Even so, I am sinner that I could easily sin towards You and You people 

Please forgive my sin Father

I truly and deeply realize that I need Your help for my wishes; 

to be someone better, to be changed inside out and to be positive

but, last reading about Experiencing God made me realize, 

that again, I need you

I may not know or identify what Your will in my life

If possible, just let Your way, Your will and Your plan be done in my life

Through the bad and evils characters that I may have

Through the negativism and selfishness that sit in me

Through all things that I complaint and dislike; people, things and circumstances

Through all the bad and good times

Please help me Lord to find my way in You

To be the one who learn to live a life in Your way and Your order

I just need Your love, Your help, Your guidance that will always hold and strengthen my heart to learn and to know that You are my God in whom nothing is impossible, the one who never fails His people and the one who always keep promises!

Heavenly Father,

writing is a way for me to express my self towards things in my life, included You

You know every thoughts (whether it is good or bad), wishes and hopes at every second in my life,

my problems and obstacles,

You know my heart, my mind and my body very well that I don't even know who I am sometimes

If my writing not a sincere expression of my thoughts on things and people, especially You

If I write good things to let people read about my ability to write,

If I write the worst part about me so that people would pity me,

If I write to talk bad about things and people

Do please forgive me,

Guide me in every letter that I type ad write next time is to glorify Your name, Your Kingdom and Your people.

If so, don't please leave me, but correct me through people and circumstances around me,

and by Your graces,

makes my writing just simply to write what I think and what I want to write.

Amen...

 

Trust In Jesus

Third Day

from the album Move

One of these days we all will stand in judgment for
Every single word
That we have spoken
One of these days we all will stand before the Lord
Give a reason for
Everything we've done
And what I've done is

(Chorus)
Trust in Jesus
My great Deliverer
My strong Defender
The Son of God
I trust in Jesus
Blessed Redeemer
My Lord forever
The Holy One, the Holy One

What are you gonna do when your time has come
And your life is done
And there's nothing you can stand on
What will you have to say at the judgment throne
Well, I already know
The only thing that I can say I

Chorus


There's nothing I can do on my own to find forgiveness
It's by His grace alone
I trust in Jesus, trust in Jesus

Chorus X2




Him: "Could you please learn to be someone who do not complain? Just try to do it one day! Try to be grateful and thankful every night to Him before you sleep. Say out every little things that you want to thank Him for a day. Just a day! Could you?"

Her: "I will try!" 

Thank you

It was about yesterday. Out of sudden, I felt so touching in yesterday worship session and got a feeling to share it out with my family of FGA. It was nothing much about my spiritual experience. It was not something so special in its way. I did not know why. I just felt so eager and touched that I am thankful and grateful to be a part of FGA NZ family; to be a part and to have everyone as my family in Christ.

I was so nervous and confused about to say it out or not, yes or no. I was struggle and I decided not to stand up, I did not have the bravery. I was thinking about it last night and today. I am regret why I was not brave enough just to say thank you to everyone.

From the deepest part of my heart, I just wanna say thank you to everyone that I am so happy, so thankful and grateful to be a part of all of you. Thank you for the support, the guidance and everything. Thank you Father that You are the one who putting me amongst them. I am blessed, fully blessed by You. I have a family and community where I am attached with that I am not afraid IF I did not deal/ socialize/ make friends with other people in others community, really (the truth is that I don't have many friends; most of my colleagues are just my colleagues, most friends are just friends ;) )...Thank you everyone; my brothers and sisters! May God bless everyone of us and may I am be blessed to be a blessing for all of you. Amen. :)

*Special thanks to my man and his family (fro loving me who I am) and Ee Wei jie (for her everything; her time to help me or just to spare her time with me, her willingness to help me in my spiritual and personal life journey. You are just like a role model for me, a mother when I need you, a lady when I need to talk to someone)...I heart you all, truly thank you to you all, may God's loves and graces are always upon you.

Quote of the Week!

"Sometimes, we just gotta let go. Of people, of feelings, of things. No matter how big this world is, we can never befriend a million people. We can't have it all. What we can have, is what we deserve."

- Diana Rikasari -

World's Greatest Supporter!

Her: Now, the electricity of the whole office is off. Everyone now is in their group and have a chit chat. I am alone in my cube, doing my things. I don't go because I don't feel like to go. Is it wrong thing to do?

Him:  :) Why do you think so? If you go or if you don't go, it is not a problem. Follow your will, do what your heart tells and be yourself!