Thursday 21 March 2013

Girlfriends

I told my man that I miss my school and college mates so much; took a ride on bus, saved money just for McDonalds, went out at night for lok-lok and so much fun and grazy stuffs with them. He told me that I only miss a friend.

That statement of him knocked me, thinking, a friend? I asked my self, is there no one around me that could be a friend for me that I miss my college friends so much? I am not sure...I am only sure that I miss my besties from college; one of them in Penang, but we don't really hang out because our time, another one is in SG & another one in TW. I miss my girls back in Indonesia too; two of the best and the rest of my school friends.

I still remember those grazy fun we had in school and college, anywhere & anytime. We were punished, we had fight and arguments, but still friends, we cried then laughed. We took pictures like no one else was around. We laughed as we were the only alive. I did not do that anymore, maybe to say that I don't really fight the right person or people too. I just can't deny I love dating my friends, but I don't really do that. I guess picking out the right one matters most. Even though it was only over a coffee for couple of hours or only a movie night with them at home, it was fun enough. 

I miss doing those stuffs. :)

I think what my man told me was right. It was not about my best friends or a person. It is about being with the right person at the right time. It could be any friend I have around. Of course, I prefer my girlfriend...I just need them to share my stories and to support each other mind & soul. It could be a talk over dinner/ drink, shopping, SPA, movies and phones.  Like any other relationship in life, friendship needs to be nourished too. I have to put time & effort, but did I? Maybe I have to try harder to win them back hahahahaha...

I truly need my girlfriends around at some moments in life. Thanks for being ones. Thanks for sunshine that you have given and will give to me. You know who you're.

Last night, I found an awesome article about girlfriends. I cried reading about it. It was all in my mind and thought. She expressed it all in her writing. It is my voice. Spending times reading it all over and over again, makes me realize, one would never have enough girlfriends; good girlfriends. I trully miss my good girlfriends a lot that I cried missing them. ;D


Girlfriends

I was just getting out of the house to take my children to school when a message came buzzing in on my Blackberry: “Girlfriends, you are needed. Can you meet me for brunch at 11am today?” My schedule raced through my mind and without much thought, I replied: “Can we make it at 10?”

I am not a planner, but this kind of spontaneity is new even to me. After getting married I had less time for my girlfriends, and even lesser since I became a Mom. Between the daily errands I had to run and the constant emotional challenges I face in raising the two future leaders of the world (yes, that’s what I tell myself to feel better), I felt I had no time to dress myself pretty, let alone be of good company to anyone. But as I sat there with my girlfriend over brunch, listening to her story about an exciting happening over the weekend, I knew that the time with her was a time well spent.

I began to think about what it means to have girlfriends in our lives. Often times when women are trying hard to balance between work and play, we tend to cast friendships aside. But we forget the benefits we get from nurturing female relationships. Not only are girlfriends the source of close and effective communication, they are also where we get that feel-good effect simply from an hour of ramblings about our feelings that can totally fill up our emotional tank for weeks. Women need each other to heal with, to laugh with, to grieve with, and to celebrate being a woman with – all of which are about communicating feelings that only women can understand (I mean, try talking your feelings out with a man and you might end up with more emotional damage than when you started.) And when emotions are all laid out on the table, when vulnerability is shown, we create a unique bond that builds up into a sense of support and security.

Casually between the laughter and the tears that followed, my girlfriend said: “I do stupid stuff and you girls are my shield.” And I can’t tell you how much truth I found in that. When we are out there making a mockery of ourselves without thinking twice, or when our worst gets the best out of us, it’s these people with whom we have a unique bond that can “bitchslap” us back to reality and point out objectively just how good we have it – without pretense, without reservation.

Girlfriends are good for the soul – I’ve heard that often before. And like all relationships, friendship needs nurturing. Whether it’s a quick chat over coffee or a nice intimate dinner or even a day away together for a spa appointment, connections with other women have proved to do a lot of good for the female soul. When we invest the time and effort to grow this friendship, it will do more good for us and others.

So ladies, since there are only so many hours in a day and so much you can put your energy into, make the right priorities and make your girlfriends a part of it. Husbands, as much as you hate feeling neglected for the few hours that your wife is off to nurture her relationship with her friends, remember that it’s usually her friends who remind her just how wonderful you are to her.

To my girlfriend – you know who you are – thank you for the sunshine!

Love,
Maya

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